Rendezvous
15 August 06 : 08.09 PM
Le' En asked me if I knew anything about dogs and how he can learn more (because he wants to get one), and I told him I didn't know and would help him ask someone who knew but only if he promised to bring me out on a date soon. He called me a silly one, endearingly.
At school, we've spoken (gossiped, to be exact) about girls, and too many of them turn out to be his ex-girlfriends. None of them lasted, but neither did we.
Le' En is a pretty boy. He's got one of the most charming smiles and can speak both English and Mandarin well (and in an accent that's really adorable). When I first entered school, he was already in there a year, and there were some girls who thought he was cute, and decided they hated his girlfriend for that reason. I think he knew there were girls who thought that way, but sometimes he forgets and those are the times I liked him best.
For every girl who liked him, there were 5 other people who really felt otherwise about him. They think he's a jerk, a poseur, a player just out to fuck girls. Fingerfucking and groping on buses seem to characterize his relationships after me. But with us, it was simple and sweet. I never slept with him. It was always, holding hands and walking from one point to another.
I can understand why people dislike him. Sometimes, he portrays himself in such a bad light, so it's not a surprise they think the way they do about him. But I see something else because he lets me see a vulnerable side he doesn't even let most of his girlfriends see. 2 years ago, after a night at Zouk, we took a cab back, and in the trip, he told me stuff about his parents and looked genuinely upset. He had a girlfriend then, who would talk to me too, but she never did know a thing. He was always honest with me, letting his guard down.
To me, he's still (and always) the sweetest guy I've ever been with, in that sense. Maybe because he never hurt me. For the longest time, he'd tell people that I was the girl he loved the most. Because he'd been held back a year at school, we could study together for the GCE O's, and we did, doodling stuff on each other's books and taking pictures of one another. Last year, he gave me a kiss on the cheek and a candy for no reason. Once, I had a quarrel with Jon and he knew, he came looking for me (and found me eventually) even though I didn't tell him where I was. He was thoughtful towards me that way.
We're always talking about how we'll start dating again or how we'd be together again, although we both know it's not going to happen. But it's always nice to think that something sweet like that is conceivable. Always.