Rendezvous
08 October 08 : 10.36 PM
Because something is upsetting me. Something I haven't felt since I was 17, so for the longest time I thought, maybe I outgrew it. Maybe it stopped hitting 18 year olds because we were old enough to know better. I thought I knew better when I left Dani, and I felt so empowered that way because finally, I have learned to let something go that I know was not good for me. But something is upsetting me now.
So I texted Dani. Despite all the shit he put me through, he loved me unhesitatingly and unconditionally, and most of all, he understood me.
"Sweets, I miss you."
"With all the boys that wanna be with you? Makes me proud. ;)"
"Dani.. don't put me on a pedestal that way."
"Haha am I? Nah I'm just relishing a good notion. So why're you not as good as my love-blindness causes me to think?"
"I don't know. Dan, I've just been so insecure about myself lately. It's just wrong, but I don't know.."
"Yeah you have. Which is slightly disheartening. Coz if there was just one thing I did absolutely right in our 2 years was to make you feel perfect bout you."
And now I'm back at square one?