Rendezvous
21 October 08 : 02.29 AM
Mando Diao - Gold
So many things to say, but the words just won't string.
But I'm slowly relinquishing hold. I want to take my phone and say something to Helme. Sorry or something again, but I don't because not receiving a reply is as hurtful as receiving a mean one. Curtis said something that made me realise how selfish I've been all these while. Vicki let it go, Drey said, don't think of giving others time, think about giving yourself time.
I laughed a lot on Saturday night. Dani had established this is who I am. Laughing and giggling at everything. Excitable little child. I laugh with my head tilted back and my hand over my mouth. Looking at the world through rose-tinted glasses. For 2 hours on Saturday, I was that again. This boy I met that day says to me today that I laugh a lot. That's because he didn't know me a year ago.
Conversation with one of my module tutors from last sem goes like this:
Jeremy: So are you dropping by this week? ;)
Me: (pause) hahahaha. you mean school or....
Jeremy: err .. i don't expect you'd be knocking on my window sometime tonight no
(I wanted to reply "well, it IS your birthday after all... lol." but no! that would semi-flirting and almost morally wrong!) But at least it shows that someone realises I'm not at school particularly often. And it just needs to stop fucking raining.